Apple Pie and Family Connections

When we first married, I told Husband many stories about my precious and wonderful extended family. I am related to some really neat and admirable people on both sides of my family lines.

Usually though, I talked more about my Mother’s people because they lived nearby as I grew up.

“You should meet my Aunt Margret,” I would often tell him.

“I hope to do that one day. From everything you say about her, she modeled neatness and orderliness for you more than your Mom did.”

“Oh, yes. Aunt Margret was the utmost in being an aunt, even though she was Mother’s sister-in-law. She loved me. I learned much from watching her.”

“And you said she was a great cook. That’s the most interesting part about her.”

“Yes, and I should tell you about her apple pie. She made homemade applesauce for her pies then filled pie shells with it. By fill, I mean over the top which she crowned with lattice crust.”

“Really ? It sounds good.”

“Oh, it was better than good, and Mother told me Margret learned how to bake and cook from my Grandmother Dutton.”

She made pies and fried chicken from the recipes taught her by her Mother-in-law, my grandmother that I never knew.

It was a connection. Do you know what I mean?

My Grandmother died four years before I was born. I only knew her through Mother’s stories and memories.

It was not the same.

But hardcore connections like apple pie constructed with pristine detail built a bridge. So did the stories of how Grandmother would attempt to redirect the temper and stubbornness she often saw in my Mother.

Grandmother was neat, tidy, and wise in many ways.

“This family-connection thing is really important,” I told Husband. “It gives me a sense of my own identity. It gives me a sense of heredity for me and my children. I know this is not a new concept, but it is poignant to me.”

Now comes the part where I relate this ADHD.

Family ties and structure help persons with ADHD perform more effectively toward their individual potential.

ADHD may be said to be a family-based or genetic disorder, which means many persons within the same unit struggle with similar life issues and challenges. In that case, family life may seem a bit more chaotic.

But that does not negate the fact that family structure is the most foundational social unit. Family structure and strictness provides a strut for the child or teen with ADHD, and that strut provides a guide for living up to potential.

Last night I talked with my cousin, Aunt Margret’s daughter who lives in Georgia. “I would give anything to be across a table from you now, eating bologna sandwiches and chips, and drinking Pepsi.” I told her. “And don’t forget the Hydrox Cookies.”

We both cried real tears at the memory.

That’s what I call a family connection.

We invite persons with ADHD or their family members to contact us at www.coachadhd.com , or phone 316-655-9807. We want to be encouragers.